new beginning

I met someone new in January. And it was sweet. We walked around Hampstead Heath and I remember feeling nervous just to look him in the eye.

I was 100% sober that whole day. And I knew at the end, that if I let myself, I could probably fall in love with him.

We still talk now and then, but i’m not sure if it constitutes as the beginning of something. He’s a dancer. I’m just an ordinary person. I try not to hold him on a pedestal. I try not to think about him throughout the day, dancing with people whose profession it is to achieve perfection, physically and visually.

I love his smile, and the feel of him next to me. I wonder how it will end.

He makes me laugh. And now I think whenever someone mentions Barcelona, I’ll think about him.

I’d rather not give him the power I know he could have. So I’ll continue to detach myself from him. He doesn’t need to know how I feel. And I’d rather not know what he feels. This way, I’m protected.

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